Daily errors and words to the wise:
A work in progress.
* Only in a film context is it okay to say something like "And if the weather is nice this weekend, we're gonna murder Steve in the desert!"
* Just because you made eye-contact doesn't mean that car won't hit you at 15 mph
* It is not socially acceptable to scream out "MURDER!" when you see a knocked-over mannequin in the midst of a busy mall. And your sister will probably refuse to walk by you.
* Taking cough medicine and running within 10 feet of any kind of furniture do not coincide.
* Saying "This is awkward".... makes things awkward.
* Yawning as you pass someone blowing cigarette smoke will probably affect your ability to control your lungs.
* Immitating an Asian tourist in an Asian gift shop will probably earn you Asian death-glares.
* When you decide to play "Hungry Gator" with the stapler at work... make sure the cute new guy is not in the vicinity.
